May 4, 2025
Unreasonable Forgiveness
“How many times do I have to forgive someone?” –Peter
Forgive
aphiemi – “to let go”
God lets our offenses go and condemns Jesus out of His deep love for us.
God’s love causes Him to let our offenses go
• John 1:9 – “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive …”
• Psalm 103:12 – “As far as the east is from the west …”
• Isaiah 1:18 – “Though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be white as snow.”
God’s justice causes Him to condemn Jesus in our place.
• Hebrews 9:22 – “Without the shedding of blood, there is no forgiveness.”
• Acts 2:38 – “Repent…for the forgiveness of sins.”
• 2 Corinthians 5:21 – “For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.”
Two Answers (Matthew 18:21-22)
1. Seven times – Peter
1st century teaching
• The “Three Times” Rule – Genesis 50:17; Amos 1:3-13, Amos 2:4; Job 33:29
• Taught by Rabbi Jose ben Judah 180 A.D. (The Talmud: Yoma 86b)
• If there is a benefit for the one seeking forgiveness, withhold it!
• If you were a victim of slander, no need to forgive, as it goes beyond two people.
• Between the second and the third time, there needs to be time to process.
2. Endless amount – Jesus
• Seventy-seven or seventy times seven
Matthew 18:23-35
Forgiveness reflects God’s character and marks the lives of those who claim to follow Him.
Kingdom of Heaven (The way God settles accounts)
Jesus creates a “new way” in relationships: healing, restoration, and reconciliation.
• Forgiveness is a key ingredient for healing
• Restoration can happen if both parties own their part
• Reconciliation is possible only if trust is rebuilt It all starts with forgiveness
It all starts with forgiveness.
We all want to settle accounts. It is human nature to want things to be correct, fair, and settled.
Two Debts (Matthew 18:23-34)
1. The servant owed nearly 200,000 years of salary (Matthew 18:23-27)
• Obviously, he couldn’t pay it
• Pleaded on his knees
• Bondservant: “Have patience with me, and I will pay you everything.”
• The King set him free and forgave him
Forgiveness is not reasonable.
“To forgive is to condemn the fault but to spare the doer.” –Miroslav Volf, Theologian
2. The servant was owed three months of salary (Matthew 18:28-30 )
• The lender immediately began to act in anger.
• Debtor: “Have patience with me, and I will pay you.”
• The lender refused and put him in prison until he paid the debt.
“…So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.” –Jesus, Matthew 18:35
“If you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.” –Jesus, Matthew 6:15 (NLT)
Is Jesus suggesting that God won’t forgive if we don’t forgive?
Answer: No.
Unwillingness to forgive may reveal that we haven’t really received or embraced God’s forgiveness ourselves.
The Journey of Forgiveness
God freely forgives when we confess.
Forgiven people are commanded to forgive
• Forgiveness is an invitation to allow God’s compassion to soften and heal all who wronged us, and to free them from the debts they owe us.
• We forgive others even if they don’t confess because it’s not our job to judge.
• Leave room for God’s justice, don’t repay evil for evil. (Romans 12:19-21)
Forgiveness is NOT denying, approving, excusing, conditional, indifference, reasonable, or reconciling.
The cost of unforgiveness is “prison” (Matthew 18:30)
• Forgiveness frees us from the crippling power of resentment
Forgiveness is a key ingredient for healing.
So, how do we forgive? (Ephesians 4:30-32)
Embrace God’s forgiveness in Jesus, knowing it empowers you to forgive others.
Choose to forgive, knowing that it is a process.
Trust God to help you let go, knowing you can’t do it on your own.
